Fat Burn · Food · Life · Unfit mother

Fatburn – Day 13

Where I contemplate keeping going…

Really?  I sat at prosecco night at a friend’s house, looked at the bowls of crisps that would normally have nestled snugly on my knee and watched the others topping up the prosecco as quickly as they drank it.  And I thought I’d feel jealous, left out or like I was missing out, but actually I didn’t feel any of those things.  Once we got past the water-drinking inquisition including pregnancy speculation (no) which to be honest I’d hoped to avoid because I didn’t want to become the focus of a million questions, or, worse still, look like a smug health freak, it was all fine.  I drank my water mainly so I’d have a glass in my hand, chatted as normal and enjoyed the company.  Turns out some of the others had either tried something similar or had thought about it and there was much discussion on willpower, results, and long-term sustainability – conversation that I’d had with myself at several points before and during the plan.  The cake I’d brought went down well although I did feel that I looked a little suspicious not eating something I’d made myself, but I don’t think anyone else was thinking the same.  One thing that struck me when I was baking was how many times I would’ve mindlessly nibbled as I worked – a few marshmallows here, scraping out the bowl with a spoon, licking frosting from my fingers and – horror – even scooping out the remains of the condensed milk from the tin.  And how many calories would that have been?  How much sugar?  And, most importantly, would I have even noticed myself eating or enjoyed it?  Probably not…cue virtuous smug feeling.

I tailran at parkrun today but even before I left the house I knew I felt a hundred times better than last week.  I ran (slowly) on an empty stomach and, for the first time in a while, enjoyed looking around at how beautiful Stormont Park is, how infectious parkrun is and how everyone is different but all brought together by this great event that I can’t help but wax lyrical about.  I was lucky enough to have company and we chatted most of the course, mostly about parkrun, all the positives that have come from it, from spending time with family who take part that we wouldn’t have before to crediting it with getting us up and out and feeling awesome on a Saturday; also how we should run more and how to get faster.

Back to my starting point; I’ve been counting down these 14 days (and what I’d do – and eat – after), now there’s only one day left I’m finding myself thinking of keeping going.  I like the results I’m seeing, I like how my body feels and how I don’t have to think about holding my tummy in or walking about with less clothes on.  I’m looking forward to taking measurements tomorrow to see the numbers, and I think I’ll decide then how I’m going to go forward – bearing in mind I already have a trip to Pizza Express planned for Tuesday…

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